In a few months I will be wearing a bridal gown, he said goodbye. Surprisingly, I have not formed a dream or true, the next day I see his hand in hand with my friend.
I, a girl preparing to turn 29, born and raised in the middle of country with sunny and windy. My parents are peasants, my childhood is not the same as my peers because I was very hard at school as well as work to help my parents very much. Just as a primary school student I had to transplant rice, harvest rice as an adult. My family is also unhappy, I often see the scene of fighting between father and mother. And there are many times my father cursed and dangled rice in front of us. I seem to get used to that, so I become upset, never crying. My dad is a weak man, no bravery and always think negative. As I grew up, I always thought that I would never marry someone like him.
Then, as time went by, I also finished high school, hoping to go far not at home, do not want to be in poor countryside and must see my dad. I entered a university in a modern city, self-go to school. After graduating school, I still keeping working in this city but monthly salary is not much. My mom has a very hard living with my father at home. My brother worked hard and settled in this city. Everyday listening to phone call from my mom made me very heartbreaking, my dad always shout at my mom and find something to break when he have issues with his business at home, even when he catches ill and can not eat or not sleep, that we also used to it.
I love my mom because she is alone, she said she also wanted to divorce to release but she still love him and me when I was not married. One night my mom said my dad could not sleep, just banging his head against the wall and she was scared. I cried very much and then decided to go back to where I was ever going to flee. I want to be party and take care of my mother. I apply for a contract at a state agency. About a time I fell in love with a person but then there was no result because he betrayed me, and I can not forgive. That love also made me resist a long time. After 2 years I met a man experienced at the age of 33, he also worked in a state agency a few miles from me.
I see the warmth and safety with him. We love each other under the support of everyone. I feel that he is the only happiness that the God brings to me, with him beside me I feel much more confident, I will be the happiest person in the world if I get married with him. He is a nice person, take care of me and I do not have to live away from home. Despite the pressure of work or the sadness of the family, but every day to talk to him is everything seem to be gone. Unbelievably, he is good pills like that. Love went so smoothly, we all intend to celebrate Lunar New Year 2016 and then will get married, he loves me very much. So just a few months I will be wearing a bridal gown, beside me he is the groom, my mom will be happy and I will cry for happiness. I dreamed of the house and the kids.
But there are so many surprise things in Life. One day he texted saying farewell because of his age, his family objected. I was frantic with pain in looking for him but he did not want to see me, I tried to get him but he just apologized and silent. Everything came too suddenly, like a magnificent splendid building I built and it collapsed in front of me. I have not figured out whether to dream or to be true, the next day I see him hand in hand with another girl and that one is my friend. Now I know that he is very smart, took me he will have nothing, but took her he will have everything. She has stable job and well-off family. I have nothing but love for you. He and my friend have betrayed me.
I went back to my room and did not eat or drink nor cry. I am trying to live day by day. Today I went back to work after a week of hunger strike at home. Everything is still the same, only I look like a ragged person, I go home to eat dinner, my father can not eat because of illness, he ran out of the tray and said he do not want to live, will hang a suicide , Afraid of all things. My father is still like that, a paranoid disease that frightens him all the way. And I ran to the lake in front of the house, looking distant, I also could not cry, just want to jump into the lake. If I die, my mother will hurt, and they will still marry and live happily.
Preparing to welcome the new year, I’m going to turn 29, what will my life be like? What is happiness? I want to give up.
Please give me some advice!!!
Thanks,
Anonymous girl.
namsunix 